Suffocating Sasuke
by pajamasecrets
Summary: While they wait for their sensei to show up, Naruto decides to have a little fun and issues Sasuke a dare.


Naruto sat fiddling with his kunai. Sasuke was in a similar position, twirling a shuriken around his index finger. Their sensei was late, _again._

This wasn't an unusual occurrence; however, it rankled them all the same.

Sasuke was pissed off, but that wasn't a huge surprise. Naruto was daydreaming; that wasn't, either. Sakura had given up talking to the two boys and was walking around in a circle, away from her two teammates.

Sasuke and Naruto could stand each other's presence, so they sat together while they waited. Occasionally, they would engage in conversation. On the outside, it appeared as if the two genin hated each other's guts. Actually, they were on better terms with each other than most other people they knew.

Naruto nudged Sasuke.

"What, Blondie?"

"Shut up, Emo-hair."

"Stop calling me that."

"Then stop calling me Blondie."

Sasuke grunted. He didn't have the energy to deal with Naruto right now.

Naruto continued. "Sakura-chan looks pretty lonely all by herself over there."

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Hmm…. I wonder if we can have a little fun while we wait for Kakashi-sensei…"

Sasuke shot Naruto a suspicious glance. "What are you thinking up _this_ time?"

A big grin spread across the troublemaker's face. "Oh, nothing really…. " He paused, then continued. "I dare you to go hug her."

Sasuke flinched. "Wait, what?"

"Hah! I _knew_ you'd be too chicken to do it."

"I am _not _chicken."

"Says the man who's scared over hugging a girl."

"Am _not_."

"Oh, I beg to differ."

"What's the big deal? It's just a hug."

"Exactly. So go do it."

"Ugh. Look, I don't want to give her the wrong idea and get her interested in me."

"I think it's kinda too late to be thinking about that."

"Hey, _shut up_! It's not like I have control over it. She's _so annoying_." He sighed, evidently defeated by his obnoxious teammate. "Why do you want me to hug her, anyway?"

"'Cause I sure as hell want to see what would happen if you did! Besides, she's hugging you all the time; why don't you return the favor?"

"Ugh, All I know is this is _not _going to end well. This is _so_ immature." Sasuke hastily stood up, dusting off his shorts.

"Hey, wait a minute, I gotta go over some rules."

"What, _rules_?"

"Rule one: the hug's gotta last at least three seconds. I'll be counting. Rule two: don't use any illusions or jutsus. Rule three: you gotta do it when she doesn't expect it." Naruto nodded, feeling this was a sound set of rules. "Oh, and don't say I made you do it. Now go!" He gave Sasuke a forceful push.

Sasuke was now more pissed off than before, which didn't settle well with him. He didn't understand Naruto's motives at all.

He approached Sakura from behind. Thankfully, she hadn't noticed him. Sasuke made a point to sigh loud enough for Naruto to hear before hastily throwing his arms around Sakura.

He counted in his head: _one, two, three. _Just as he was pulling away, Sakura turned around to face him, showing a completely bemused expression and scarlet cheeks.

"Sasuke…-kun?"

"Um, Sakura… hi there."

"Kyaaaaah!!!" Sakura squealed before holding Sasuke in what looked like a death grip.

"Okay…. Saku…ra… That's enou—_GACK_!!"

Naruto was rolling on the ground, tears steaming down his face. He was laughing so hard it looked like he was in pain.

At that moment, Kakashi happened to appear.

"Um… Should I even ask what's going on here?"

Naruto shook his head, still gasping for air.

Kakashi cleared his throat, and then raised his voice a little.

"Uh, Sakura?"

"Yes, Kakashi-sensei?" As Sakura replied, she let go of Sasuke, who fell limp on the ground.

"Sasuke-kun? _SASUKE-KUN_?!"

Kakashi chuckled uneasily, walking over to Sakura.

"You see… you kind of suffocated him… Yeah, he's unconscious right now.

"Huh?"

She looked down at the boy she had just choked the life out of. A small trickle of drool was running down the side of his face.

"Oh no!! Sasuke-kun's _dying_!!!"

"No, no, just a little… unresponsive at the moment…" Kakashi reassured his student, scooping up Sasuke and throwing him over his shoulder.

"I guess Sasuke can't participate in the mission now, can he?" Naruto winked at Kakashi.

"Naruto, you sick little freak." Kakashi laughed, shaking his head. "Now I _really_ don't want to know what happened." He looked over at both Naruto and Sakura, probably thinking up a punishment of some sort.

"I'm taking Sasuke to the hospital. I bet some of the trainees there would just _die_ to do CPR on this guy."

Sakura growled. "_Kakashi-sensei_!!"

Naruto snorted. "Hah! I guess she just got served her punishment."

Kakashi shook his finger at Naruto while still managing to keep Sasuke on his shoulder. "You're not off the hook either, Naruto. I've got a feeling that you were behind this somehow. And since you're so eager to go on this mission, how about you sit out this time?"

Naruto grumbled, folding his arms. He turned around and headed for his house.

"Now, Sakura, once we get Sasuke breathing again, I suppose we can set back out on our mission."

"Wait… Didn't you say he had to get CPR at the hospital?"

"Yep. And you get to watch!" He smiled.

"_NOOOOO! KAKASHI-SENSEI_!!!"


End file.
